Straight No Chaser- 9 Things We Have Learned From Future And Ciara's Relationship
- Shanicia Boswell
- Feb 10, 2016
- 4 min read
You probably saw this trainwreck in motion as soon as it left the station. Future (Nayvadius Cash) was rounding off his third child by the third woman he happened to impregnate when news hit that he and Ciara were indeed an item. From then forward we were bombarded with photos of the two sharing matching Bentleys, lover directed music videos, and even Ciara posing with Future's previous baby mothers. Seemed like magic right? WRONG.
Here are 9 lessons we are learning from Ciara and Future's courtship.
1. Know The Difference Between A Drive By And A Relationship: Yesterday Wendy Williams so publicly shamed Ciara by calling her out on the fact that she got pregnant by a man who already had three different children by three different women. I rarely agree with Wendy but her statement on knowing the difference between a drive by and a relationship was legendary. Women, normally we step into situations with men and think that somehow because of us he will be different.
Fun tip: Your yoni cannot change a man. We all have one and they are quite similiar in their purpose.
We laugh and chastise his previous relationships to only fall victim to the same fate they have. Pay attention to the signs.
2. Leave [Social] Media Out of Your Relationship: I know it is tempting to post every five minutes about how you have found the love of your life after only dating for two weeks but just don't do it. Allow the relationship to fully develop before you add others and their opinions into it. When a relationship is new, it is also easy to permeate. While we all say we do not care what others think, we do and their thoughts can have an impact on how we move forward with our significant others.
3. Keep Your Friends Close But Your Enemies Closer- Except For Ex Baby Mamas: While your partner's baby mother is not exactly your enemy, tread lightly on trying to become besties immediately with the woman your partner shares a child with. I know we all want to seem like that progressive down for anything type of chick but sometimes we end up setting ourselves up to look stupid in certain situations.
Tread lightly. Be cautious.
And once again, allow time and consistency to play a role in your decision making. There should always be peace but it does not mean you have to be sisterwives.
4. If You Can't Take The Heat, Get Out Of The Kitchen: We all loved and raved at Ciara's song, "I Bet" after her breakup with Future. While she never claimed the song was directly an attempt to get back at him, I think her audience knew otherwise. Now, she is suing him for basically doing the same thing. When your relationship ends, stay mum to those who are not a part of your daily life. It can come back to haunt you.
"So you bought me a car, he can buy that too I can take care of myself and I can find someone To do it too, baby You actin' like you upgrading me, I upgraded you You and me Fashion Week at Paris, I put you on
To that new"
- Sure Ciara, we believe you aren't talking about Future
5. Russell Wilson Is A Painful Rebound: I like Russell. I really do. But I will be honest, from jump I thought that their relationship was staged. It seemed to be a facade put on by Ciara's camp to show how strong and resilient she was after her untimely romance with Future. Russell's all star record was a drastic difference from Future's and from the type of men Ciara was ususally associated with.
We saw her go from Goodies to Vegan Salad.
What an upgrade! Or fraud...but who knows? Maybe some real love has actually kindled from this firestorm?
6. Leave The Babies Out Of It: One of the biggest issues I took with Ciara in regards to this breakup is how she quickly released photos with Future's son and her new beau Russell Wilson. I am all for moving on and even allowing your new partner to meet your child (in proper timing) but it was a little early to start giving Russell Wilson the step dad alcolades, matching jerseys, and stroller pushing duties. I can imagine this added some pretty heavy steam to their fire pit. Honestly, how is a man supposed to act?
7. Do Not Keep Your Children Away From Their Fathers: It is so easy to blur this line.
Because things did not work out for you and your ex, does not mean things did not work out between your ex and your children.
Ciara claims that she has allowed Future to see his son 19 times in the past two years. That is no accomplishment. That is not even once a month. It is easy to hold this control over your child's father when things are not going your way but this is where the weight falls on our shoulders as women- let go of the bitterness and do what is right for your children.
8. Don't Sue Your Ex For $15 Million: Ok well..you get the picture. We may not all have a rich baby's father to sue but $15 million sounds like angry money. Ciara feels jilted because Future has finally started speaking publicly on their sour ex-romance. We know you're mad Cici but $15 mill? Sounds a little suspect...
9. You Are Connected For Life: At the end of it all, the person you have a child with will be in your life forever. It serves you better to just move on and stop holding grudges. There is so much time missed when there could be peace. Your children are watching your every move!
What are your thoughts on Ciara suing Future for $15 million?
With love,
-Shanicia
Opmerkingen